Do you want to come and play?

It has occurred to me that it might be of my (and maybe some others, although probably not) benefit to start blogging my experience with cancer. I would call it battle with cancer, but I don't like calling it a battle. I hate it when you hear "such and such lost there battle to cancer" etc, it just sounds wrong. Cancer never wins. People just move on.

Anyway, I won't start from the very start of being told and having to tell people because really it's not overally exciting and it upsets me. I'll start from first going in for my first chemo.

The weekend before I was due in awful, I wasn't eating or drinking and my tummy was so swollen that i couldn't sit, lie or stand withoug feeling like i was going to die. So on the Monday morning i travelled up to the imaginatively named "Cancer Centre" in Balfast City hospital. I won't talk about everything, but i was pretty damn ill by the time i got there. Or so the Doc told my mother. So I was lying in the men's ward waiting for my single room when a young chap comes in to put that "magic cream" all over the inside of my arm so he can insert a Picc line. He went on at me for ages about how simple it was and no big deal and doesn't hurt and takes him no time at all (I wonder how many times he's had it done) before making me sign this thing that people usually sign before surgery. Comforting. I was really brave and got it done (I also later found out that he did it wrong the first time and i actually had 2 attempts made on my arm). For those of you who do not know what i'm going on about, A picc line is basically my lifeline now. It's small tube that enters a vein at the top of my arm and goes all in to a vein near my heart. It's where i get all my chemo etc. Things that keep my alive really.

(Going to stop and get a cup of tea. Well really, the nurse arrived to give me an injection and i freaked out and sent her on her way. Mummy said its a one off though and im getting it tomorrow. But really I need to go calm down, I'll continue later)

LONELY.

Well, just looking up some cool playmates from the fifties and sixties. Fell inlove several times.
Here, have a look..

Anyway, enough of being a lezzer.
I ned help on what to be for the Dead Famous - Maybe mrs.lovett? or Judy Garland? Jayne Masfield?

VALENTINES DAY IN 2 HOURS
yes
I'm quite excited
although, i tihnk that's just because i can't wait to eat
When i'm working tomorro i'm going to refer to all my customers as lover, i.e "Have a good day lover" and so on.

Also...no there isn't actually an also. I have a boring life.


CAN I SEE YOU ALL SOON?! PLEASE. fuck sake.

Do you ever decide to lok at pictures of celebrities and then get depressed?
That's what i've just done, it's so annoying. And then cos i'm depresesd i want to eat...hahahaha.
Well, i searched pictures of jesica alba and scarlet johanson so far. Who knows who'll I search next, probably dita von teese and then marilyn monroe.
BLAH.
Going to get fit, like go to the gym and go walking and do sit ups and shit and cut down on salt and sugar and general fatty foods.
It'll last like a day, but at least the intention was there. Sometimes i think that it's actually impossible for me to lose weight.

Anyway, you see dead set? When the big fat guy got ripped apart?

plus, really excited about Twilight and how that day out will be fantastic.

well boys, its halloween week, time to get your party brains on!
Firstly, I think we need to meet up and make costumes together, share ideas etc.
THEN we need to carve pumpkins.
Also, need to have a halloween themed dinner, with lots of candles and scary music.
Laura, did your costume arrive?

on "what is happening in my life" note, the other day in work, 1000 pounds worth of clothes was stolen. And trish, you sent me a text that wasn't meant for me.

Thought I'd make a wee entry about work.
Working in topshop.topman is in general alright. bit annoying when customers come in and like just leave clothes in the fitting room, all inside out and in the corner. Its like, why would you do that? Why? Lazy people. Or when people go a mess up the area you just tidy and then don't pick up after themselves.
Was working in Topman today(Sunday), by myself. It was really quiet, but that was okay, cos i felt like shit after being up half the night with a bad tummy :(, but on the bright side, I got asked out by a customer which really brightened my day. Also, A woman who I work with wants me to model in a fashion show for cancer research and we get to model fun things like vintage. Also we have to do all the highstreet stores, but apparently its really good fun. So, wahey.

Hating school. Hating, theres no point in me being back, I ain't going to get better grades.

Was going to make a picture post. But got bored.
I'll give you a few.
Such a romantic.



HALLOWEEN.

CRUSH



WE LOVE MARILYN

 

Well I have to say, this summer wasn't up too much.
But promptly at the END of it. I get offered TWO BLOODY JOBS. Which just made me stress out because I didn't know which one to pick. I had to go with TOPSHOP, because..well...it offered first and I had already said yes. To be honest, think I'd rather work in Harry Corry's..but there you have it.
Also, after all that "OMG I DON'T SCHOOL ANYMORE, GOING TO UNI". I may be back at school for 6 months, doing some repeats.
And going to uni next year.


Now, for the realy problem.
What to do with my hair??

It's Robert Pattinson Birthday today.
People in school looked down at me for knowing this.

ALSO, my boyfriend got told he looks "like that guy Edward in Twilight" today.
THAT'S RIGHT. I GO OUT WITH A SEX GOD.

   

None of these pretty girls are me. I do not do performing arts.

Never eat chicken goujons and chicken noodles.
Makes you feel sick as a dog.

I ' m 18.
Holy shit.
I going to have to have babies and stuff now.
*edit*

All I can say is THANK GOD. 

If it wasn't for Stephanie Meyer, where would I direct my left over Harry Potter Obsession?

I think I may (dare I say it) be slightly more obsessed with Twilight. 

Or maybe just in a different way.


I don't know, I don't care. All I can say is - I LOVE YOU EDWARD CULLEN. So much so that I call my boyfriend "Edward" by mistake.

Yes, well I went to see "P.S i love you" on tuesday night(CRAZY TUESDAY, anyone?) with my dearly beloved(Philip) and I can't decide if it was good or not.
Yes, yes I know I cried from start to finish. And my lips and my nose swoll up and my eyes went puffy and turned black. But still, that didn't stop me from seeing the flaws of the film.
On whole, I think, it is a good wee watch if you are in a girly, soppy romantic mood. Which I usually am, it comes along with being inlove I think. If you aren't in that mood, go see it simply for the how the portray the irish, extremely stereotypically and made me laugh. But at the same time, deep down, it was kinda true and we all know it.

but PHWAOR and also CORRR at your 2 irish men. 


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v229/justicexforxall/gerardbutler.jpg


http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v229/justicexforxall/jdm.jpg

P.S I have developed the consumption.

OMFG. HOW GOOD? very. thats how. It did take me a while before I got over the fact that it wasn't actually Snape, Wormtail and Jack Sparrow...

It combines everything I love in one film...just puts them all together to make a really disturbing, death filled, strange and beautiful picture. And I think that sums me up pretty well.

EVEN GILES WAS IN IT.




I missed Trisha though.

So, yet another monday over. I was so manically depressed about school yesterday and was wanting to drop out and all other sort of dramatic things, but now that it is over...it wasn't that bad.
Naturally the day started off by pissing rain, honestly, the sky was actually bawling its eyes out. But it was ok, because Emlyn drove by in his car and give me a lift. I love knowing people my age that can drive, if you don't know anyone who can drive, get to know them and if your too young, well...tight one.
ANYWAY, it was a pretty easy peasy day all in all, only had one class (ICT doesn't count)                                  

However, me and trish and several other people SLAVED AWAY CLEANING BOTH COMMON ROOMS SQUEAKY CLEAN. Honestly, people in our school are dirty dirty ragamuffins. How were you brought up, that you can't wash a dish after you. PFFT.

So now I'm just rolling around, eating a WHOLE box of chocolate fingers with tea - biting off the ends and sucking the tea up through it. Little tastes of heaven I tell you.

As you can see, nothing of interest happened today.

P.S SWEENY TODD ON FRIDAY!! hrgbwir;gro;sigr'n.

 
P.P.S   Majella - Sir, tell us a joke!!!
             Dr.Laverty - YOU.
             The Class - ........................HAHAHAHAHAHA.  

 

I made an lj account. Then I deleted it like a whole 2 seconds later. I didn't bond with it you see.

So here we are again. On a nice(dull) Sunday morning(afternoon) sitting in my pj's and thinking about life. And clothes.

Mainly clothes.

Dresses to be exact.

ANYWAY, bienvenue to my lj.